AUGUST'S TOP TEN LIST
STORY IDEAS REJECTED BY THE JEFFERSONIOWANEWS' EDITORS
10. "Bigfoot DNA Matches John Roland"
9. "Mad Dentist Yanks Out Girl's Tongue"
8. "Mime Arrested for Disturbing the Peace"
7. "Osama Bin Laden Located in Farlin"
6. "Bigfoot Keeps Local Farmer as Love Slave"
5. "UFO Beacon Discovered on Mahanay Tower"
4. "Statue of Unknown Person Found on Courthouse Lawn"
3. "Skydiver Devoured By Starving Birds"
2. "Armless Veteran Beaten for Not Saluting Flag"
1. "Tony Andrusyk to Replace Lincoln on $5 Bill"