MARCH TOP TEN LIST
Top Ten Reason Jefferson Didn't Host the Winter Olympics
10. Vandals threatened to steal Olympic rings
9. Seven Hills sled run judged too dangerous
8. Organizers had to help buddy Hank move that weekend
7. Only wanted to host for the free tote bags
6. Bode Miller though Greene was a dry county
5. Only anthem JSPC band learned was "Who Let the Dogs Out?"
4. Thought male figure skaters were doing a tribute to "Brokeback Mountain"
3. Pyrothechnic display to consist of Wanda and Earl Crump with sparklers
2. Local churches unhappy with figure skating costumes
1. Proposal filed late