The Jefferson Iowa News®

 

  Curfew Ordinance Defeated By City Council

October in Jefferson has once again spawned a plethora of werewolf attacks. As usual, they seem to be centered around Squirrel Hollow, but the problem this year has spread even into the city of Jefferson itself. Since the first of the month, seven park-goers are missing at Squirrel Hollow, and even in town folks are keeping their kids home after dark.

At this week's city council meeting, the issue was addressed by proposing an 8:00PM curfew for both the city of Jefferson and all area parks. Unfortunately, the council was unable to pass the ordinance. The final vote was three to two against, with nay votes being cast by councilmen Jake "Wolfbane" Fredrickson and Tim "Fang" Schweitzer. The lone female councilmember Paula "Mistress of the Dark Lord" Pedersen also voted against the resolution.

Ms. Pedersen stated, "We may be being a bit hasty here. This seems like nothing more than a knee-jerk reaction to only a handful of people getting slaughtered by werewolves. This resolution also appears to have some racist overtones associated with it."

As is the usual tradition, Jefferson's annual hide-and-seek contest will once again be held at Squirrel Hollow
on October 31, at 8:00 PM. Despite the ongoing dangers, nobody seems to be willing to change the date, simply because "that's when it's always been".

This year's winner will once again be awarded a brand new vehicle from Finch's Motors. In the six-year history of this contest, they have yet to give away one new car, however, as no one has come forward. In fact, all of those contests are officially considered to be still ongoing, with the eventual winners still in hiding. For example, in 2006, all eleven contestants are apparently still playing the game.

Winners of these awards will be posted on this web site as they are determined.
 


 Spencer Straight 10-15-2008