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  Seven Hills Park Found to be Misnamed

A recent geological survey has uncovered evidence that a local county park has been misnamed, and as a result several generations of park-goers have been swindled into believing they may have got less than they paid for.

Seven Hills Park is located just southwest of the Jefferson city limits, and is known for its scenic beauty, colorful fall foliage, nature trails, and a sled run which some of us fondly remember. Unfortunately, no matter how many times we investigate this area, it becomes obvious that there are actually only six hills within the park's perimeters!

A geological and terrain survey completed last week confirmed what we have long suspected - six hills. There is another, seventh location within the park that our resident geologist referred to as "a slight rise, possibly even a mound, but certainly not a hill." All future park visitors, especially those paying shelter house fees, should be aware of this before planning their leisure activities.

To be quite honest, only four places on the map of Seven Hills Park are quality, top-notch hills. Two other spots barely qualify as hills, while no seventh hill can be found. No amount of erosion or human-induced activity can be cited as a cause for the discrepancy. Rather, it would seem that this name was incorrect from day one.

Local officials are remaining silent on this issue, no doubt afraid of possible class-action lawsuits, which very well may be filed by generations of previous park users.

Jeffersoniowanews invites anyone interested to visit the park and count the "hills" for themselves. In the meantime, refer to the actual map at left, showing the area and terrain encompassed by this park.


submitted by Rick Bland, 09-15-08